DON'T MISS THESE MIDDLE CHILD HOLIDAY CLASSICS:

“Melvin, the Middle Reindeer”

“The Middle Child's Night Before Christmas“

 Chanukah, Oh Chanukah (Middle Child Style)”

 

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'Tis the Season to Feel Neglected

         When you're a Middle Child, it's always the season to feel like you're an afterthought. Middle Child Syndrome doesn't take any time off for the holidays. In fact, being overlooked and forgotten feels even worse during the holiday season. And all the gift giving that goes on only compounds the problem. It just offers so many more opportunities for a Middle Child to feel snubbed and slighted. Like we need any more reasons to feel snubbed and slighted.

          You should also know -- like with most things involving a Middle Child -- giving holiday gifts to a Middle Child can be very tricky business. Give us the same thing you bought for our siblings and you could be accused of not caring enough. Give us each something different, and you could just as easily be accused of getting them something better! It’s a no-win situation.

          After almost a lifetime of dealing with this dilemma, as both a Middle Child gift giver and Middle Child gift recipient, I’ve come to the realization there is only one solution to this problem: getting something for the Middle Child that no one else would possibly want. Something only a Middle Child would appreciate. But where could one possibly go to find such a gift?

CLICK HERE 

to visit the Smack Dab Holiday Shop! 

 

          The Smack Dab Holiday Shop is where you’ll find over 300 Middle Child themed items, featuring apparel, accessories, and limited time only Chanukah and Christmas items, including Christmas ornaments and stockings. No self-respecting first or last born would wanna be caught dead within a mile of this merch! It's the perfect place to find a gift that's right for every Middle Child on your list. That is, if you remembered to put them on your list!

FULL DISCLOSURE: there’s no guarantee that anything you order now will arrive in time for the Holidays, but not to worry -- better belated than never. Trust me, it beats being forgotten altogether. 

 

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Ten Years of Middle Child Melodies

          As you probably haven't heard by now, the International Middle Child Union is celebrating 10 years of obscurity. As part of the festivities, I thought it would be fun to take a little stroll down our very own Middle Child Musical Memory Lane and revisit some of our favorite Middle Child melodies. What better place to start than with our take on the Simple Minds classic “Don't You (Forget About Me)”...

 

          Gene Autry had a huge hit in 1950 singing the story of a fluffy bunny, “bringing every girl and boy baskets full of Easter joy.” “Here Comes Peter Cottontail” became one of the most popular Easter songs ever. As you might expect, our Middle Child rendition tells a slightly different tale...

 

          “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” is an American classic. The Middle Child version is, well, a whole other ballgame...

 

 

          Everyone knows the story of “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.” Of course far fewer know of  his Middle Child Syndrome suffering sleigh mate...

 

 

 

          Okay, this next one isn't a song, but while we're in the Christmas spirit, I couldn't resist sharing our telling of “The Middle Child's Night Before Christmas.”

 

 

 

          And speaking of holiday spirit, leave it to a Middle Child to turn “The Festival of Lights” into 8 nights of agony...

 

 

 

          When #middlechild started trending for no apparent reason a few years back, I thought maybe all my hard work was paying off. Then I found out that rapper J. Cole had just released his mega-hit, “Middle Child.” Of course, we couldn't let him have the last word...

 

 

CELEBRATE THE BIG DAY WITH MORE MIDDLE MUSIC! 

Check out the Middle Child's Day Playlist

 

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Lower Than a Groundhog

     This past Sunday was February 2nd -- Groundhog Day! I know this, because a reminder popped up on my iPhone. I did not enter the date, and I certainly didn’t set up a reminder. It’s a default entry on the Google calendar app, right in there with Thanksgiving and Christmas. Groundhog Day! Like it’s some kind of national holiday.
     It’s not like I needed any reminder anyway. It’s kind of hard to escape. It was all over the news. Forget impeachment, Brexit, Coronavirus -- will some woodchuck weatherman see his shadow? We need to know! Geez. They even made a movie about Groundhog Day,  and then a Broadway musical.  It’s that big of a deal. Robert Frost wrote a poem about groundhogs. Robert friggin’ Frost! When the only poet to win four Pulitzer Prizes for poetry writes a poem about you, you know you matter.
     It must be nice to be a groundhog. They must be sooo happy, having a special day with their name on it that so many people pay so much attention to. How nice for them. I mean, how awful would they feel if there was a Groundhog Day and nobody paid any attention to it? Could you imagine?
     Oh wait, I can -- it would be like Middle Child’s Day! Which is kind of ironic, because just like Groundhog Day, year after year, it’s always the same thing -- everybody ignores Middle Child’s Day! No headlines. No movie or musical. And certainly no built-in Google calendar entry or iPhone reminder. Sure, there’s that Middle Child poem I’ve written about in previous posts, but that hardly counts. That poem was messed up. But sure, let's all make a big fuss over Groundhog Day because, you know, we wouldn't want to hurt their feelings!
     Honestly, is a weather forecasting rodent worthy of more attention than a Middle Child? Actual human meteorologists can’t predict the weather, and we think some grubby groundhog can!? Of course they can’t. Punxsutawney Phil, the world’s most famous furry forecaster, has only been correct 39% of the time over the last 100 years. That sucks!!

     Not to worry though. There are actually other marmot meteorologists we can turn to. Thank god. And while some of them have a better record than Phil, they’re not always in agreement. Take this year, for example. Staten Island Chuck (NY), Buckeye Chuck (OH), and Dunkirk Dave (IN) all agree with Phil. None of them saw their shadows, calling for an early spring. But General Beauregard Lee (GA), Jimmy the Groundhog (WI), and Sir Walter Wally (NC) did see their shadows, which means six more weeks of winter. Now what!?
     Maybe Bee Cave Bob holds the key. This Texas weather-forecasting armadillo also agrees with Phil, if that sways you one way or another. And if it does, you have a serious problem. But there’s one thing I can tell you with 100% accuracy: whether any of these creatures saw their shadows or not, Middle Children can expect six more weeks of being overlooked and forgotten.
     Probably more.

The Middle Child Syndrome New Year’s Challenge

     Towards the end of every year, Middle Children have ample opportunities to experience multiple episodes of Middle Child Syndrome. With an overabundance of family gatherings from Thanksgiving through Christmas and Chanukah, plus the added exchanging of presents, the chances of feeling left out and slighted are plentiful. But that’s all behind us. Yesterday’s news. Now, we can look forward to a brand new year of coping with our namesake syndrome!
     When it comes to Middle Child Syndrome, one thing is for sure: nothing ever changes. It’s out with the old, in with the old. New Year, same syndrome. I, for one, can hardly wait to see what exciting MCS opportunities will present themselves in the New Year. And I know I won’t have to wait long.
     Certainly by the end of the first day of 2020, any Middle Child worth their salt will have already struggled with their first MCS flare-up of the new decade. In fact, I’d say -- and I don’t think I’m going out on a limb here -- for many of us our syndrome will likely kick in shortly after the big ball drops at the stroke of midnight.

“This one called that one to wish a Happy New Year but didn’t call me!”

     That seems like a pretty safe bet. Or maybe

“They spent New Year’s Eve with them but didn’t invite us?” 

     So many possibilities. How far into 2020 will you (or a Middle Child you love) get before Middle Child Syndrome rears its ugly head, and what triggers it?
     Take “The Middle Child Syndrome New Year’s Challenge” and tell us all about it. Share your story on Twitter (@midkidmusings), on Facebook (@smackdabpage), or leave a comment below.
     Wishing everyone a New Year filled with happiness, health, and plenty of ATTENTION!

Joy Vey!

Celebrate the Holiday Season with these Mid Kid Klassics:

NEW!!  
“Chanukah, Oh Chanukah” (Middle Child Style)

8 nights of presents means 8 nights of Middle Child Syndrome!

PLUS: Read “The Middle Candle: A Chanukah Story”

“The Middle Child’s Night Before Christmas”

Not a creature was stirring... except the Middle Child!

PLUS: Was the author of "The Night Before Christmas" a Middle Child?

CLICK HERE to find out more.

“Melvin the Middle Reindeer”

The musical tale of everyone's favorite forgotten reindeer.

PLUS: Shop the Smack Dab Shop for the best selection of Middle Child gifts.

(Nothing will arrive in time for the holidays, but we're used to being forgotten!!)

No Thanks!

     It’s that time of year again. Halloween is a mere memory, the Christmas creep has begun, and the “Thanksgiving is the Middle Child of Holidays” tweets and articles are popping up like Black Friday Preview sales. But I beg to differ. Thanksgiving is so not the Middle Child of holidays! I wrote about this way back in 2013, but it obviously bears repeating.
     Far from overlooked and forgotten, Thanksgiving gets more than it’s fair share of attention. And there’s certainly no need to make up a Middle Child of holidays when there already is one. It’s called Middle Child’s Day, for God's sake! On August 12th!! And unlike Thanksgiving, when there are parades all across the country, we don’t even get a single parade -- even though we’re really trying. So enough with the Thanksgiving pity party. I don’t want to hear any more Thanksgiving Middle Child nonsense.
     Anyway, it’s not like this is the first time people have used our beleaguered birth order as fodder for metaphorical mockery. I also wrote about this in a previous post (big surprise), and since then the list has grown even longer.
     People are giving Middle Children status to everything, from wine:

     to automobiles:

     to demographics:

     to computer software:

 

     and even reading material:

 

     Although that one could be a compliment I suppose, depending on what book you’re talking about.
     I guess the good news here is that Middle Children are getting more attention than we think. Just not the kind we want.

Middle Child's Day Parade Seeks Grand Marshal

     The Holiday Season is here -- Middle Child’s Day is August 12! Like I’ve always said, Middle Child’s Day is like Christmas in August. Just without any of the presents. Or celebrating. And certainly none of the attention. In any case, preparations for our special day are in full swing.
     As founder of the International Middle Child Union, I am proud to announce we are now accepting applications for a chance to be Grand Marshal of the 2019 Middle Child’s Day Parade. Imagine how great it would feel to have huge crowds of adoring onlookers giving you their undivided attention. It’s every forgotten Middle Child’s dream come true!
     Unfortunately, applicants will definitely have to imagine the feeling because -- big surprise -- there is no Middle Child’s Day parade. But look on the bright side. Unlike the Thanksgiving Day or the Rose Bowl Parade, being the Grand Marshal of the Middle Child’s Day Parade will take very little of your time. Still, we need to be prepared for the day Middle Child’s Day finally gets the recognition we’ve long been seeking.

     When we do get our parade, we’ll have to move fast -- before someone changes their mind. We’ll need a Grand Marshal already in place to take their place atop our brand new I.M.C.U. float. (FULL DISCLOSURE: said float also doesn’t exist yet. But when it does, it will be brand new. Unless, of course, it’s a hand-me-down. Which there’s a very good chance it will be.)

     Interested applicants are encouraged to e-mail the I.M.C.U. with a brief explanation of why they should be Grand Marshal. Or if you know a qualified Middle Child, tell us why they deserve consideration. Reach us at:

midkidgrandmarshal@gmail.com

     Maybe nothing else we do in our lives will get us the attention we feel we’re lacking, but being the Grand Marshal of a parade? Surely that would change everything. But probably not.

COMING SOON: THE 2019 MIDDLE CHILD’S DAY PLAYLIST

“The Middle Child’s Night Before Christmas” (2018 Update)

The Likely Author of “The Night Before Christmas” Was a Middle Child!

Livingston: All I want for
Christmas is some credit!

     While I was putting together an updated version of “The Middle Child’s Night Before Christmas” (previously released in 2014), I found it odd that Santa’s 7th reindeer is named “Donder” in the famous Clement Clarke Moore poem, but called “Donner” in the 1949 Gene Autry song, “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.” So I did a little Mid Kid muckracking, and made a shocking unrelated discovery: Clement Clarke Moore might be “The Grinch Who Stole the Night Before Christmas!” The likely real author was a Middle Child! His name was Henry Beekman Livingston, Jr. Naturally, he wasn’t given credit.
     When the poem (originally titled “A Visit from Saint Nicholas”) was first published in 1823, it was submitted anonymously. In the following years, it was reprinted without attribution in countless publications. Word had spread that it was written by Moore, and in 1837 a friend of Moore's put Moore's name on the poem. When Moore included the poem in a book of his poetry published in 1844, he became accepted as the true author. It wasn’t until 15 years later when Livingston’s family first discovered Moore was taking credit for the poem they remember their father reading to them as his own as far back as 1807! They waited until 1900 before going public with their claim, and the issue has been debated ever since.
     In 2000, Donald W. Foster, a Literary Detective and Professor of English at Vassar College, argued Livingston was the true author. And as recently as 2016, New Zealand scholar MacDonald P. Jackson spent a year looking into the matter, concluding Livingston was the likely author. Good enough for me! (And you think I’m nuts spending a mere blog post on this?)
     While experts still debate who the real author of “The Night Before Christmas” was, there’s no question who wrote this version...

      In case you’re still wondering, the names in the original 1823 poem were actually “Dunder” and “Blixem,” Dutch for “thunder” and “lightning.” (Which kind of makes sense because Moore knew German, not Dutch, and Livingston was of Dutch descent.) In a subsequent 1837 version, “Blixem” became “Blixen,” to make it rhyme with “Vixen,” and “Dunder” was renamed “Donder.” When Moore included the poem in his 1844 publication, he retained “Donder,” but “Blixen” was renamed “Blitzen.” Although “Donner” was popularized in the 1949 Rudolph song, the name was mentioned in the New York Times seven different times prior to 1949. So, mystery solved! Sort of. Not.

New Middle Child Christmas Classic Discovered!

     “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer” has become a beloved Christmas standard -- except for those who have recently taken issue with its portrayal of bullying and sexism. Well, they’re certainly not going be happy about this news.
     After years of searching, a select team of the world's best Middle Child Musicologists -- working under the direction of the International Middle Child Union -- have unearthed a never before heard version of the holiday classic which actually predates Rudolph. And the protagonist in this newly discovered rendition is treated even worse!
     Much like Rudolph, “Melvin the Middle Reindeer” tells the tale of a reindeer overlooked and cast aside by his furry-pawed peers. However, there is no happy ending for this reindeer reject.
     Music forensic experts have determined this discovery was recorded in the very same studio as the version made popular by Gene Autry. But it was placed on a shelf and everyone forgot about it.
     You can download and listen to the track from SoundCloud. They even found a video, which is really weird since that wasn’t even a thing then.

NEXT WEEK: The Return of “The Middle Child's Night Before Christmas.”

The Ultimate Middle Child Gift

     With all the gift giving that goes on during the holiday season, it got me thinking about a very special gift I was given when I was just two years old. To this day, I still take it with me wherever I go. It’s not something you can buy in any store, and you definitely can’t wrap it up to put under the tree. But it truly is the gift that keeps on giving.
     Forever.
     It’s the gift of Middle Child Syndrome.
     I know in the past I’ve written much about the curse of Middle Child Syndrome. And believe me, at times, it really is. Feeling left out, left alone and left behind -- not so much fun. But in the spirit of the holidays, I’m trying to be positive and looking for the silver lining. And in all honesty, Middle Child Syndrome can sometimes be a useful tool. Like a “Get out of Jail Free” card for bad behavior.

     Why did you kick your brother in the balls? Middle Child Syndrome made you do it!
     Your wife thinks you’re being more annoying and obnoxious than usual? Your Middle Child Syndrome is acting up!
     Yelling at a co-worker because he moved your yogurt to the back of the fridge? Clearly a case of severe Middle Child Syndrome!

     So playing the Middle Child card can be a handy crutch. Just like the tee-shirt says, it can be an excuse for almost anything.

     Oh, and there’s another benefit to having Middle Child Syndrome. It’s something my brother and sister don't have, so it’s ALL MINE! I don’t ever have to share it with anyone. Yay!!

     But remember, unlike the ugly sweater somebody gave you last year, Middle Child Syndrome is a gift you can’t ever return. 

Celebrate the season with the Mid Kid Christmas Classic:
"The Middle Child's Night before Christmas." 

Middle Child Christmas Tweet Update

It's only Christmas morning, and if Twitter is any indication, Middle Child Syndrome is already off the charts! Looks like it's going to be a looong day for the Mid Kid! Here's just a small sample. Think of it as my Christmas gift to you -- Merry Christmas!!

Karla Crawford (@kcrawford610)
Once a middle child, always a middle child, granny wrote chloe and Matthew a check and forgot about me!
Feliz Navi(dil)do (@Michael_Dillman)
Mom: "Mike, I love you as much as any mother loves their middle child."
Cory (@c_mac18)
Starting off Christmas by being asked if Id rather sleep on the floor or in the closet. MiddleChild syndrome is beyond real right now
OD (@PatOD31)
I sleep in the basement on a futon when I stay at my parents house now. Middle child syndrome is real.
Cat Loftus (@loftus_cat)
Middle child Syndrome kicks in hard at Christmas
Tate Alambar (@TRAlambar)
I never got to open my presents first. #Middle child.
highest catlady (@HIGHESTcatlady) I have the worst middle child syndrome. Both my siblings got go pros and I got the cheap version of Apple TV lol

A Very Not-So-Merry Middle Child Christmas

     As the Holiday Season shifts into high gear, so does Middle Child Syndrome. It’s difficult to deal with on a normal day, but when the holidays roll around, things can get real ugly. Think about it -- controlling MCS can be a challenge when you’re with just your parents or some of your siblings. But when all your family is together, there’s no telling what may happen! Especially when gifts are involved. Birthday gifts are one thing. Birthdays are spread throughout the year, so comparing who got what can be more challenging. But on Christmas, it’s all right there in front of you. There’s no escaping it. And if you celebrate Chanukah, it can be 8 times worse! Trust me, no matter what you do, a Middle Child will find a way to conclude they got the worst gift. Even if you got everyone the same thing! That’s just the way we roll.

The Middle Child Syndrome Advisory
has been raised to CODE RED
for the holidays!

     In an effort to spread some Middle Child merriment and hopefully diffuse the situation, I offer up the following. First, here’s a link to a previous post: “Helpful Holiday Tips for Giving Gifts to a Middle Child.” Good luck with that. You should also check out the Smack Dab Shop for all the Middle Children on your list. The gift list, not that other list. Order now, and this year you might actually be able to make your Middle Child feel like -- the favorite! Now THAT would be a Christmas miracle. Finally, why not celebrate the season in true Middle Child style? Fire up the YouTube, gather ‘round the virtual fireplace, and enjoy that Middle Child Christmas classic, “The Middle Child’s Night Before Christmas.” Happy Holidays!

COMING SOON: Join me on “THE MID KID ROAD TRIP” as I LIVE Tweet my journey down the eastern seaboard with my IN-LAWS! Details to follow.

"The Night Before Christmas" Middle Child Makeover

          As Middle Children of all ages brace themselves for perceived Christmas party snubs and prepare to feel like their siblings are getting better (and more) gifts, it's time to tell the tale of what really happened on Christmas Eve. This is definitely not your father's Christmas classic -- unless he also has Middle Child Syndrome!

The Middle Child's Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas in some other house
the first born and last born were quiet as a mouse.

The one creature stirring, I probably should mention,

was the Middle Child constantly seeking attention.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

still the Middle Child complained, “Theirs are bigger, no fair!”

While the oldest and youngest were snug in their bed,

visions of hand-me-downs danced in his head.

And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,

were so sick and tired of his Middle Child crap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

now what was he up to, now what was the matter?

My wondering eyes through the window could see,
a person I’ve seen many times on TV.

She whined and she moaned, did this blonde haired young lady,

I knew in a moment it must be Jan Brady!

“Marcia, Marcia, Marcia,” I heard her exclaim,

“She gets all the glory, I get all the blame.

If just for one day I could feel like the favorite,

I’d relish the moment, and always would savor it.”

MIDDLE CHILD SYNDROME ADVISORY ALERT!!

WARNING: The International Middle Child Union (I.M.C.U.) has raised 

the MCS Advisory to CODE RED in anticipation of Christmas.

Thanksgiving is NOT the "Middle Child of Holidays!"

          I can always tell when Thanksgiving is approaching because people are dusting off their “Thanksgiving is the Middle Child of holidays” and “Thanksgiving suffers from severe Middle Child Syndrome” tweets. When I saw these messages popping up last year, I wrote a post about it that contained links to several articles detailing why the authors believed Thanksgiving is overlooked, forgotten, and overshadowed by Halloween before it and Christmas after it. I didn’t think much about it at the time, but I’ve given it much thought over the past year and have come to the conclusion that these people are  friggin’ nuts!  While these Thanksgiving thoughts certainly aren’t the first Middle Child metaphors I’ve ever heard, they might be the most egregious. (For a list of more, read “The Metaphorical Middle Child.”)

          Forgotten?  Overlooked? Are you kidding me!? People love Thanksgiving.  Some people look forward to their Thanksgiving dinner the entire year.  I mean, what’s not to love about Thanksgiving? There’s food, football, and lots of pie. In fact, I would argue that Thanksgiving is more than loved – it’s BEloved. (Ask a Middle Child how loved they feel.  Go ahead, I dare you. I’d be happy if I felt liked!)

Thanksgiving: The Middle Child of Holidays

I'm not going to take credit for this one. I never really thought about attributing Middle Child qualities to holidays, even though I have often heard people refer to Wednesday as the "Middle Child of the week." But I saw lots of people Tweeting about Thanksgiving being the Middle Child stuck between Halloween and Christmas, so I dug a little deeper (a.k.a. Googled it) and found quite a few articles about it. I know that Holidays and family get-togethers can be particularly stressful times for Middle Children, but if you can find some time between everyone making a huge fuss over your brother's new job but totally ignoring your promotion and your mother making your siblings all their favorite dishes and not remembering you absolutely HATE strawberry rhubarb but thinking it's your FAVORITE dish, you might want to feast on these. And have a Happy Thanksgiving. At least try...

Thanksgiving: The Middle Child of Holidays

Why Thanksgiving is the Middle Child of Holidays

Thanksgiving: The Middle Child of Holidays?

Thanksgiving: The Holiday with the Middle Child Blues

Thanksgiving - The Middle Child of Holidays