Thursday, January 28, 2021

More Reasons to Wear a Mask

          I was taking a walk the other day after having lunch. I had just eaten a salad, and normally I’d be wondering if there were any embarrassing pieces of lettuce stuck between my teeth. I’d be all worried about some rogue romaine, excess endive, surplus spinach, or any other kind of lingering leftover leaves literally hanging out in my mouth, making me look like a Hillbilly with missing teeth. But I was surprised to find that I was not at all concerned. Why? Because I was wearing a mask.
         I wear a mask because I don't want to get the virus and I don't want to possibly transmit the virus to the people I love – or people I don’t even know, for that matter. It all seems very straightforward to me. Yet there are a good amount of people out there who, for one reason or another, do not seem to feel the same way as I do about the importance of mask wearing. These defiant #maskholes include the likes of Sen. Rand Paul,
The Official Middle Child Mask

Scott Baio, Rep. Majorie Taylor Greene, Ted Nugent, and way too many others.
          This got me to thinking...
          As if preventing the spread of a potentially fatal virus wasn’t reason enough, there are actually many other benefits of wearing a mask. So for anyone who still thinks that helping bring an end to a global pandemic that has taken over two million lives and stopping the spread of the virus so we can get back to normal aren’t good enough reasons to simply wear a mask, here are some more: 
Need extra warmth on a cold Winter’s day?
Wear a mask!
Unsightly zit on your chin or tip of your nose?
Wear a mask!
Enjoy your burger with extra onions, your pizza with lots of garlic?
Wear a mask!
Didn't feel like shaving?
Wear a mask!

Don’t think there’s anything particularly funny about
the “laugh line” wrinkles around your mouth?
Wear a mask!
Haven't trimmed your nose hairs in weeks?
Wear a mask!
(But for God's sake, trim your nose hairs!)
Forgot to brush your teeth this morning,
or maybe you just have really bad breath?
Please, by all means, wear a mask!
(And stay six feet away while you’re at it, thank you.)
Feel a Herpes cold sore coming on?
Definitely, wear a mask!!
          I’m not sure if any of these reasons will be enough to convince the hard core anti-maskers to change their minds. But maybe, just maybe, it will sway some -- even if it’s for all the wrong reasons. As for me, I think I might actually now have some very good reasons to keep wearing mine, even after this is all over. 


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